fast-forward 7 years

Hey, this isn't a prank or your imagination... it's me. I forgot all about this blog. Guess once that 4th kid arrived I didn't have time to deal with a blog. Then of course the husband made it home from Afghanistan. Life took over, and its okay... because that's what life should be doing.

So - Seven whole years... I couldn't possibly recap that. The Marine Corps is officially over, we don't play those games anymore, and now we are living back up near home. It's been a long adjustment but we are doing good.

I honestly only went online because I wanted to find a way to blog about things that I am dealing with. I live a good life, but there are things I need to get in order, things I have to do for me and my family if I am going to stand here and say I don't suck. I don't know. Personal decisions huh?

Now, I'm kind of confused about what to write because I thought I was going in as a newbie- stranger... didn't recall having a toe in the water already. Craziness.

I guess I can get real for a moment. I'm quitting smoking and I am stressed to the freakin max! I don't know if I can do it. I want to be able to do it. but dang it - addiction sucks. I look back at my life and you know, I quit some hardcore super stupid things back in the day - why is this so hard? This should be a joke for me, but it's not. I'm effectively cutting out the one feel-good constant I have had in my life for the last 21 years. How do you walk away from that???

There's a slew of shit that comes with this post. Hey, lets be real. Seven years! Things have happened people and in time maybe we can get all caught up. For now... I've got a cat waiting to watch a Hallmark Christmas movie with me and it's too cold to say no.

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Now Things Get Interesting

We have hit the 21 week mark. you know most women are excited to hit the second leg of the pregnancy, they are finally out of the wood-works, and know that all its about is baby gaining weight, developing lungs, and waiting for its entry into the world. Not so much around here. After them first 20 weeks, my pregnancies quit being fun and start being scary. Other women get excited to feel their babies moving so much, all this little boy does is move around, and it's making me nervous, he agitates my uterus; hasn't caused any contractions yet, but he's still got some room and doesn't have the strength of a 28-32 weeker yet. Don't get me wrong, I love being pregnant, but its scary. And its scary to know I am carrying a boy because they suck at doing good if they are born early. I suppose it will be what it will be and there isn't anything I can do to change the plans set in place for our family. I honestly dont think anything is going to go wrong, I think everythin...

Oh my Aching....

Every morning for the last two weeks or so, I have been waking up with this stupid headache. I can pop some tylenol (3 usually does the trick) but it's getting really old. I was hoping that chopping off all my hair would help, it takes the weight off your neck, but nope... headache is still rocking. Im sure my liver and kidneys are just thrilled with all the tylenol. Oh well, what do you do? So, I was talking to a friend last night about the girls and how they helped out yesterday with all the house work. You know, I do appreciate it, but I don't want it to become something necessary or mandatory. I think they enjoy doing stuff like that because it's not demanded of them, and I want them to continue to find joy in the mundane things in life. Like how I love standing in front of the sink scrubbing dishes... its my quiet time, and my thinking time, and everyone leaves you alone while you're doing dishes. I like mopping too, that really gets you some peace and quiet becaus...

Officially on Deployment Time

Im officially back on deployment time. *le sigh* This is always the worst. Normally I am ready to pass out at 9; but no, no, no... not during deployment. During deployment I don't really get tired at all. Here I am at 1030 so wide awake I think I may be forgetting to blink! Dang it all. I really do not understand it, it is so stupid. I feel like the minute that Steven walks out of the door my brain goes stupid. I mean I was up until nearly 0200 this morning, up at 6 and Im no where near tired. Maybe there is an upside to having a baby during deployment; I dont sleep anyways, and we all know that evil little newborns never let you sleep. This may be a blessing in disguise. *shudder* newborns scare me. Funny coming from the lady with bun #4 in the oven, but I think that first couple months where they wake you up at 10, 11, 1, 3, 4, and 5... ugh! When I found out I was pregnant with Ivan I literally felt the physical side effects of nervousness, tension... it's like damn if babi...

Mama Arty v.2.0

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