Skip to main content

Missing In Action

Well, I honestly have to question my mental health on certain days. It feels like every time I talk to someone who is about to make a career move, their number one concern is how long that job is going to take them away from their families... I do not think we ever even considered this when he started doing what he is doing now. It's the weirdest thing to me that people are conerned with deployments and training schedules... I never really give it much thought because it is normal to us, I guess.

I remember a time when I was adjusting to Steven always being gone, and I literally had to carry a picture of him with me at all times because I was certain that I was going to forget what he looked like. There were very late nights, up with kids, where I was worried I was going insane because I did not feel like this husband of mine actually existed. How ridiculous is that?

Now, I suppose we have gotten so good at being apart, that he can be gone for majority of the year and I don't even feel like he has been gone longer than a week. Of course during his absense, I feel the lack of his presense around here; but the moment he gets back, I feel like we just pick life back up where we had to leave it off. Some friends have jokingly apologized to me about how him doing his next job is going to mean his being gone frequently and I do not really get the jokes because he's always gone... it is not a big deal around here. It is a major reason why I told him never to factor in how much he would be away from us when deciding what his next move is going to be. Its not important.

Sure, its important for the children to see and spend time with their father, and they do not need him gone endlessly, but I am trying to teach them that as military kids (and someday as wives) that they need to be supportive of the job that is providing the comforts they enjoy. I want them to look at him one day, and not be upset because he was never around, but to be proud because he made that sacrafice so that we could have more and live better. For the girls, I want them to be good wives one day, that don't get upset when work calls their husbands away. The odds of them marrying into the military are probably pretty good, it's what they know and will grow to love. They have to be able to support and understand that.

And as for Ivan, if he follows in steven's footsteps and joins, or even if he does something different. I want him to grow up seeing and understanding that a good wife doesn't care if you are gone, because even when you can't be home, that does not mean you are not important, or are no longer a part of your families life. He has the absolute most perfect role-model for what it takes to be an amazing husband, father, and provider. I have no doubts that he is going to be an amazing man someday. But I feel every amazing man needs an amazing wife that supports him back home.

So, regardless of where the Marine Corps leads us in the future... distance is irrelevant. All I care about is that while my man is away, he always remembers that he is able to do so, without worry, because we hold him close to home here.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Now Things Get Interesting

We have hit the 21 week mark. you know most women are excited to hit the second leg of the pregnancy, they are finally out of the wood-works, and know that all its about is baby gaining weight, developing lungs, and waiting for its entry into the world. Not so much around here. After them first 20 weeks, my pregnancies quit being fun and start being scary. Other women get excited to feel their babies moving so much, all this little boy does is move around, and it's making me nervous, he agitates my uterus; hasn't caused any contractions yet, but he's still got some room and doesn't have the strength of a 28-32 weeker yet. Don't get me wrong, I love being pregnant, but its scary. And its scary to know I am carrying a boy because they suck at doing good if they are born early. I suppose it will be what it will be and there isn't anything I can do to change the plans set in place for our family. I honestly dont think anything is going to go wrong, I think everythin...
Post a Comment
Read more

Oh my Aching....

Every morning for the last two weeks or so, I have been waking up with this stupid headache. I can pop some tylenol (3 usually does the trick) but it's getting really old. I was hoping that chopping off all my hair would help, it takes the weight off your neck, but nope... headache is still rocking. Im sure my liver and kidneys are just thrilled with all the tylenol. Oh well, what do you do? So, I was talking to a friend last night about the girls and how they helped out yesterday with all the house work. You know, I do appreciate it, but I don't want it to become something necessary or mandatory. I think they enjoy doing stuff like that because it's not demanded of them, and I want them to continue to find joy in the mundane things in life. Like how I love standing in front of the sink scrubbing dishes... its my quiet time, and my thinking time, and everyone leaves you alone while you're doing dishes. I like mopping too, that really gets you some peace and quiet becaus...
Post a Comment
Read more

Officially on Deployment Time

Im officially back on deployment time. *le sigh* This is always the worst. Normally I am ready to pass out at 9; but no, no, no... not during deployment. During deployment I don't really get tired at all. Here I am at 1030 so wide awake I think I may be forgetting to blink! Dang it all. I really do not understand it, it is so stupid. I feel like the minute that Steven walks out of the door my brain goes stupid. I mean I was up until nearly 0200 this morning, up at 6 and Im no where near tired. Maybe there is an upside to having a baby during deployment; I dont sleep anyways, and we all know that evil little newborns never let you sleep. This may be a blessing in disguise. *shudder* newborns scare me. Funny coming from the lady with bun #4 in the oven, but I think that first couple months where they wake you up at 10, 11, 1, 3, 4, and 5... ugh! When I found out I was pregnant with Ivan I literally felt the physical side effects of nervousness, tension... it's like damn if babi...
Post a Comment
Read more